Juggling

Sorry for the radio silence, I've been a touch overwhelmed. Yesterday my dear uncle and godfather offered me a part time position as a real estate agent. It's a hell of an offer, seeing that he runs one of the biggest brokerages in Cabo, so why did I feel like he just signed my life away? Perhaps it's because this would be job number 3, and I have no intention of quitting #1 or #2. Part of me wants to bury my head in the sand (conveniently located right outside my door), but mostly I just want to talk about it.

Even after years of sociology describing the different ways men and women handle stress or conflict, I can't seem to rise above the need to just vent, aimlessly. Supposedly, in American culture at least, women tend to feel better about problems by talking about them, going over the events, venting. Men feel better when the problems are getting solved. So you have a situation where a woman comes home and wants to talk about how awful her day was, and her husband (trying to help) starts to tell her what she should do to fix it. She doesn't want instructions, she wants to "talk about it". He might not see the point in just postulating, let's solve things damn it!

Ok, the woman part of me wants to be acknowledged for my effort, someone just tell me that it's pretty cool that I'm not dropping the ball on these three, rather consuming, jobs. I'm juggling them all, and not one of them has complained. My masculine side says, none of these jobs are what you went to school for. Keep only the real estate job, make enough money to start my gender institute, and stop whining.

That would be too simple wouldn't it? I believe it's the same part of me that loves the jerk guys which finds comfort in chaos. This part of me will slowly kill me, but I believe the reasoning goes something like, the highs are higher and the lows are lower when there's more at stake, which is better than melancholy. The more things I have on my plate, the more full I feel, like I'm actually doing something. Which is better? To be partially fulfilled but never devastated? Or to constantly love/hate your life or lover, peaks and valleys included?